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stop saying you're sorry!

Updated: Jun 7, 2018



Dear Actor…. boy do we have a lot of ground to cover….. so i am just going to jump right in….


lets start with this…. STOP SAYING YOU'RE SORRY…. as much as i appreciate people being polite… if every time you call your manager or agent and start with “i am sorry to bother you”  we will start to wonder why you are bothering us…. if you need something ask… if you need to talk cool….this is why we are here…ok.. well…one of the reasons we are here.. (hey… i have this same issue when people get on an elevator and apologize….WTF?)  grow some… well you get the point - you never have to be an ass… but you don’t have to be so wishy washy either… you are better than that!


weekend calls - hey… i am here for you… really… and if something happens over the weekend as far as i am concerned this is a 24 hour a day job….but….if you are calling your reps on the weekend to shoot the shit or just chat about your career…. and it’s not an emergency… i would say let folks have their weekend…. don’t misunderstand - there are a lot of times we have to do things on the weekend and i don’t know many folks who have issues doing them…..truly… but if it is something that can be done while we are in the office…. then it allows us to recharge our batteries…. so…before you pick up the phone on saturday or sunday… ask yourself…. is this something that can wait until monday? now if you are thinking well what constitutes a weekend call i would say if you calling to ask if you should wear the pink shirt or the blue shirt…. that can wait until monday…  did you just meet steven speiberg and he wants to hire you the next day for a cameo in his new movie… that would be a call asap. calling from jail…. is an anytime call…. but expect a lecture….just saying 


auditions….so few things to touch base about…. a lot of times auditions happen quickly - especially in TV…sometimes they come the night before….there is really no excuse for no being prepared. this is your job. i get it shit happens…but if you are always asking for more time then your process is wrong. if it is problematic then get into a good audition technique class. i know there is a lot of self taping going on….but if you can get in to a room better for you!!  


if you make the decision to not go on an audition… i am going to want to know why….you thinking you are not right for the role is not a good enough - or you think the role is not big enough….although all valid excuses you need to actually talk to your rep…. tell them your thoughts… listen to what they say…. chances are….and i know you may find this weird… but chances are we have a bit more info on the project than you do…. and there could be a reason why we are sending you in for something smaller (maybe it is a huge project and it is something that you should do…maybe its a show that is over soon and you should have it on your resume…) point is… don’t just say you are not going…. 


i think it may be time to leave my agent or manager….making excuses for it…. So we have gone over this many times....an actors only real control over their career is moving representation....and as a manager I don't fault you for it.....but lets talk about it...if it is really not working at your agent or managers (and sometimes it really just doesn't work). Don't make lots of ridiculous excuses....chances are if it is really not working your agent or manager is probably feeling the same way.....have a conversation...I think you may find that everyone is more on the same page then your thought....this is not to say anyone would or would not try and change your mind....me personally... I don't beg anyone to stay....but don't come to me with silliness either. and while we are on that subject…


you do need to put things in writing… but for god sake… be smart about your letter…. if you could see some of the letters letting managers go you would laugh your ass off - some of my favorites are when actors talk about how much they love us…. how awesome we are… how stoked for everything we have done for them… but they want to try and go in a different direction… it’s not personal.. it’s business (seriously… did you just quote the godfather to me…) when you send letters filled with that kind of crap… you have made it personal…..it is clearly no longer business as you have just told us how great we are and how great everything has been…. soooooooooo - yeah.. we have to wonder if you are actually right in the head. cuz clearly somewhere there was an issue… and if there really was not… and another company just looked brighter and shinier….well…. something else entirely… also… does not speak to such great character…..whether you are leaving me… or i am the shiny toy… either way… that is not a great work ethic. 


is there a right way to leave… i don’t know… but what i can tell you is there is a wrong way to leave and if it really is about business then make it about business - if you really love the people you are working with and you want to go in a different direction then wait until your contract is up and move on… don’t be a jumper…. if every year you are looking for the new shiny thing…. that says a lot about character.  but…. if there is a real issue and you don’t want to say anything then you are not being fair to the company either…  


ok… now go be a rock star 

#WhatEveryActorShouldKnow 

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